


Five Times Lance Made Keith Smile and the One Time He Didn't

by redlionboys



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Childhood Friends, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Weddings, Yes., do i like pain?, get ready for some tears kids, its cute though dont worry, sorry - Freeform, uhhhh theres some sad stuff too
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-11
Updated: 2017-05-31
Packaged: 2018-10-17 11:56:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 10,893
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10593513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redlionboys/pseuds/redlionboys
Summary: Keith met Lance on a hot day and lost him on a cold one.





	1. so sublime; when the stars are aligned

**Author's Note:**

> Hey there's some stuff in this that could be considered triggering so I will list them-  
> *very light talk of suicide (nothing too gory or specific)  
> *some homophobic slurs  
> *vomiting  
> *mention of drug use (again nothing specific)  
> *cancer   
> All scenes containing any of these will be surrounded by *** ***   
> Hope you enjoy!
> 
> Song that goes with this chapter- Blue Eyes by Cary Brothers

Keith thought that  _ this  _ boy may have been the  _ most  _ beautiful boy in the world. 

 

Wait, let’s back that up a little bit. 

 

It was summer, a little bit after Keith had finished third grade, and one of the hottest days of the year. Keith was moving into the old victorian mansion across the street from the old plaza; the one equipped with an old thrift store and abandoned ice cream shop. The mansion was something like Keith had never seen before, with columns and gardens and even a fancy driveway. His nine year old mind couldn’t quite comprehend what his life held meant now that he was adopted and had a family. What significance that the house would have, or the small Florida town he now belonged to.

 

It was that  _ one  _ hot day when Keith met the boy.

 

He’d just finished putting up his constellation posters up on the smooth blue walls of his new room. His new mother called him downstairs, her silken voice never failing to make Keith feel warm. His short legs carried him down the stairs two at a time, strands of his dark hair flying in his eyes with each bouncing step. His mother was in the kitchen, unpacking a large bag of groceries. Her long shining sheet of blonde hair blew gracefully in the wind that came through the open window. She turned around and faced him, a smile spreading across her face and lighting up those grey eyes that Keith was beginning to recognize as home. 

 

“Keith, sweetie, I brought some stuff to take to the neighbors,” his mother said gently, kneeling on one knee to slide a box of crackers into the wooden row of cabinets beneath the sink. Keith toyed with the strings at the hem of his striped sweater. He didn’t really like talking to new people, and he was sure that the neighbors would think that his family was a little strange, a mix of different skin tones and names that could probably confuse someone who didn’t understand. 

 

“Can’t Taka do it?” Keith said. “I’m still hanging my posters.”

 

Keith’s mother pursed her pink lips, placing small hands on her hips. “Keith…”

 

“Stop calling me that!” Keith’s new brother called from the living room. His head of dark hair could be seen from the back, but Keith knew that Takashi, who was a few years older than him, had a handsome face that also looked nothing like his mother’s. “It’s just Shiro.”

 

“Right,” Keith said. “Why can’t Shiro do it?”

 

“Because the boy is your age and I thought it might be nice to meet someone like you,” Keith’s mother replied, placing a can of tomato paste in the pantry. “School doesn’t start for another two months, you know.”

 

“Yeah,” Keith said, looking at the tiled floor, “I know. I just don’t want to talk to new people right now, Mommy.”

 

The look in her eyes was soft. “I know, sweetie. It’s just some cookies and flowers. You don’t have to stay for too long, anyway.”

 

Keith tilted his head to the side. “Please?”

 

“It’s on the table,” she said sternly, giving him a knowing look. “You’re a big kid now, remember?”

 

His head dropped and he let out a little groan. “Okay, Mommy.” Keith wrapped his arms around the small basket of goodies and trudged out the front door. The only house around was one across the street from them, much smaller and much more lived in. Its roof looked like it was falling apart and the paint was cracked. But Keith thought it looked like someone loved it very much even with all of its flaws. He skipped across the street, making sure the basket didn’t tip over. 

 

Once he reached the door, he knocked happily and tried to put a polite smile on but it felt awkward so he just waited. After a few beats, the door cracked open and a pair of wide brown eyes met his. It was a girl, maybe 12 or 13 with wild frizzy hair and freckles. She tilted her head to the side. 

“Who’re you?”

 

“I’m Keith,” he said, holding the basket up. “I’m your new neighbor. From that house.” He pointed behind him. “I was just adopted,” he said proudly. “I brought you some stuff.”

 

“I’ll get my-”

 

“Who’s there!” A voice squealed and the girl was shoved to the side. Striking blue eyes met Keith’s as a smaller child slipped out of the door and stumbled onto the porch with him. He was wearing a blue shirt and overalls; one side unclipped. He was barefoot but it didn’t seem to faze him. 

 

“I’m Lance,” the boy said, smiling. He had a small gap between his two front teeth. “I love you!”

 

“Uh,” Keith said, “thanks?” 

 

“No problem!” Lance shrugged and grinned widely. “I love a lot of people. What’s your name?”

 

“Keith,” Keith answered, holding the basket out, slightly intimidated by this enthusiastic kid. Was this the boy his mom was talking about? “These are for you and your family.”

 

“ _ Quién está en la puerta, _ ” a voice called out. The door pushed open further and a friendly looking older woman stepped into the frame. She was wearing a nice blouse and pants, with flour all over her face and hair. “Oh, you must be the new neighbor! We’re making cupcakes for you right now. Aren’t we the ones supposed to bring you a welcome basket?” Her smile was friendly and made Keith feel safe. 

 

He scuffed his foot on the wooden planks. “My mommy just told me to bring this over.”

 

“Why, thank you, sweetheart,” she said, taking the basket. “My name is Celeste McClain, would you like to come in?”

 

“I think I should go back to my mom,” Keith said. 

 

Celeste nodded. “Of course. Tell her thank you for this wonderful basket.”

 

“Mom!” Lance shouted. “Can I go with Keith to his house! We’re like, best friends now!” He gave Keith another grin. It made him feel warm. 

 

“Do you think your mom would be okay with that, Keith?” Celeste asked, tilting her head to the side like the younger girl did. Keith figured that they were all related, because they all had the same nose and warm brown skin. But Lance’s eyes were the only blue ones.

 

“I think so,” said Keith. “I guess you can come with.”

 

“Awesome!” Lance yelled, grabbing Keith’s hand and dragging him down the porch steps. Before reaching the edge of the road, Lance skidded to a stop and looked both ways in a very exaggerated manner before beaming at Keith and sprinting across the blacktop. “Your house is so big. Are you rich?”

 

“Uh,” Keith said as they made it to his lawn, “I’m not sure. I’m kinda new to my family.”

 

“How can you be new to a family?” Lance laughed and slowed down, but he didn’t let go of Keith’s hand. “Haven’t you just always been with them?”

 

Keith shook his head. “I was adopted like my brother. But it’s okay, because it’s like my mommies were always there. They love me a lot.”

 

Lance stared at him for a few moments with wide eyes before shouting, “That’s so cool! I have three sisters, no brothers. You’re lucky! And you have  _ two  _ moms? Having one is awesome, but two sounds so cool!”

 

Keith nodded, pieces of his short hair falling into his eyes. “They are pretty cool.”

 

“Can I meet them?” Lance asked excitedly, bouncing on his heels. “Please?”

 

“Well, Mommy is in there, but Momma is at work,” Keith replied, wrapping a tiny fist around the door knob and twisting. The scent of what he was learning to be the new house smell hit his nose as he led Lance into the house, closing the door behind them. “Mommy! I brought Lance from the other house!”

 

His mother came around the corner, her blonde hair now in a braid that traveled down her shoulder. “Hi, Lance! It’s nice to meet you. I’m Laura Sayed.”

 

“I’m Lance McClain and Keith’s best friend!” He gave Keith’s mom that toothy grin and held out his small hand. She shook it, laughing gently. 

 

“It’s very nice to meet you,” she said. “Would you like a juice pouch?”

 

“Yes, thank you!” Lance smiled brightly. Keith’s mom chuckled and walked into the kitchen. The two boys followed, watching as she pulled two pouches from the fridge, distributing one to each of them. Lance sucked his down in seconds while Keith took small sips every once in awhile. They sat together in the dining room while Keith’s mom continued to put groceries away. Lance babbled on about the school and the town and Keith listened intently.

 

“There’s one kid at school, Zak, and he’s really mean,” Lance told him. “He might say some bad things to you, but I’ll make sure that he can’t hurt you.”

 

“Thank you, Lance,” Keith’s mom said, laughing a little to herself. “I’m glad I have a big strong man looking after my Keith.”

 

“Hey!” Keith said indignantly. “I am very strong too!”

 

“Yeah!” Lace agreed. “We’ll protect each other!”

 

“Okay!”

 

“Okay!”

 

“Wanna go to the park?” Lance asked suddenly. “It’s just down the street a little. If Mrs. Sayed will let you.”

 

“Just Laura is fine, sweetheart,” Keith’s mom said, messing up his hair. “And yes, Keith may go to the park, but only if Shiro goes with you.”

 

“Shiro is my brother,” Keith informed Lance, pointing to the living room where Shiro was watching TV. The older boy raised his head when he heard his name. 

 

“What’s up?” He bounced off the couch and approached Lance with a smile and his hand outheld. “Hi, I’m Shiro.”

 

“Your shirt is really cool,” Lance said, shaking his hand. 

 

Shiro looked down at his galaxy tank top and grinned at Lance. “You like space?”

 

“I love space,” Lance said, smiling so wide that Keith thought his face might break. “I want to be an astronaut.”

 

“Me too!” Shiro said. “How old are you?”

 

“Nine,” Lance replied, holding up nine fingers. 

 

“Not fair!” Keith gasped. “I’m still 8.”

 

“Ha, I’m older!” Lance said, sticking out his tongue. “Now let’s go to the park.”

 

“We’re going to the park?” Shiro asked, looking at his mom. 

 

She nodded. “You’re taking those two crazies to the park down the road. Keep a close eye on them.”

 

“I will,” Shiro promised. Keith believed him, he was 16 and really strong. “Let me grab my shoes.”

 

“I never wear shoes,” Lance announced proudly.

“Well, what if you step on something?” Keith’s mom asked, holding out a pair of alien boots that used to be Shiro’s. “Why don’t you put these cool boots on?”

 

“Awesome!” Lance exclaimed, grabbing the boots and sliding them on. “Let’s go!”

 

The walk to the park was short and hot. Lance skipped ahead of Shiro and Keith, spouting facts about their new neighborhood and the people in the town. His brown curls flopped with every hop and Keith was entranced by the movement. Everything about Lance was interesting, and Keith was practically drinking the waves of personality that just rolled off of the small boys shoulders. 

 

Once they made it to the small park, Shiro went and sat down on the bench that faced the big yellow slide and flapped his hands at the two younger boys. They both went for the stairs, scrambling over each other to climb them. Keith made it up first and raised his hands above his head in triumph. Lance looked at him from under his lashes, that grin breaking out on his face. 

  
And for the first time, Keith smiled back. 


	2. you're the only thing that i love; it scares me more every day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song- Chocolate by Snow Patrol
> 
> Two boys figure out some things underneath a changing sky

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its gettin there

“We’ll get caught!” Keith stage whispered to Lance, grip tightening on the other boy’s hand. Lance just laughed and tugged on their intertwined hands. Keith was halfway out the window, reaching his bare foot out to catch the branch that Lance was balancing on. 

 

“Just a few more inches,” Lance urged, his blue eyes shining. How could Keith say no to that gaze? He finally caught the bough with his toes and pulled all the way out of the window. Once he was stable on the branch, he shut the window as quietly as he could. Turning back to Lance, he nodded. The other boy grinned wildly and let go of his hand, deftly swinging down the tree branch by branch. Keith followed, not as agile, but just as quickly. 

 

One they reached the ground, Lance grabbed Keith’s hand again and sprinted down the sidewalk, the blanket he had tucked into his backpack flapping in the wind.The hood of Keith’s jacket flapped in a similar fashion, the red a stark contrast to the inky black of night. His feet pounded behind Lance’s, both barefoot and covered in dirt. 

 

Lance led him through a small area of woods, past their neighborhood and into the night. The small Florida town didn’t have much light pollution, so the stars shone brightly down on the two boys as they ran. Keith was in love with the feeling of the night, and watching the strands of brown hair that flew past Lance’s forehead, he thought maybe it wasn’t the only thing he was in love with.

 

Lance took Keith down a dirt road he’d never been to, slowing to a walk. Both boys caught their breath, looking at each other and raising their eyebrows. Lance still hadn’t let their hands separate and Keith wasn’t arguing.

 

“You’re losing your speed, kid,” Lance told Keith, punching his shoulder lightly. 

 

“Lance,” Keith sighed, rolling his eyes, “you’re like, three months older than me.”

 

“Yeah, but I’m 14 and you’re still 13, so…” Lance poked his arm and giggled. 

 

“Where are we going?” Keith asked. “I don’t recognize this path.”

 

“That’s because it’s a secret,” Lance said. “It’s my place.”

 

“Why haven’t you shown me before?” Keith said, slightly offended. “I thought we were best friends and all that.”

 

“We are,” Lance reassured, “I’ve never shown anyone before. I started coming when I was six, and you’re the first one to see.”

 

That made Keith feel a  _ little  _ better. “I’m in so much trouble if my moms find out. And I’m taking you down with me.”

 

“Oh please, my mom is ten times stricter than both of yours combined,” Lance said, waving the comment of with his hand. “It’s death by yelling and sandals for me. A most unpleasant death.”

 

“Let’s not talk about death,” Keith said quietly. “Uh, please.”

 

Lance looked at him out of the corner of his eye, a concerned eyebrow raised. “All right. You okay?”

 

Keith nodded. “It’s okay.”

 

Lance looked like he didn’t quite believe him but shrugged it off. “We’re almost there.”

 

They continued down the path for another minute before reaching a break. A flat field covered in tall grass and flowers stretched out beautifully in front of them, each blade of grass blowing gracefully along with the gusts of wind that travelled down the meadow. A dark shadow drowned the greens of the plants, masking them in a stunning purple. Keith lost his breath for a moment before he turned to Lance with wide eyes. The other boy was beaming at him, his blue eyes all scrunched up. 

 

“Do you like it?” Lance asked. 

 

“It’s…” Keith searched for the right word. “Exquisite.”

 

“Okay, mister college level vocab” Lance joked, elbowing him. “Let’s go lay down. It’s only good at night, hence the need to sneak you out.”

 

“I’m glad you did,” Keith admitted, following Lance when he started walking into the field. “This is amazing.”

 

They found a spot where the grass wasn’t too tall and flattened the blanket out on the ground. Lance flopped down in practiced ease, patting the spot next to him. Keith slowly lowered himself to the quilt and relaxed as the grass pressed into his back. Lance squeezed their intertwined hands and pulled them close to his chest. Keith’s heart pounded so quickly, he was surprised that the other boy couldn’t hear it. 

 

“I came out here to learn all the constellations,” Lance announced after a few moments of silence. “Every season. It was some obsession of mine. I guess it’s what got me into astronomy and all that.”

 

“Then you had to go and get me into all your space junk too,” Keith said, nudging his shoulder.

 

Lance chuckled. “Yep and you’re thankful.” He tucked his free arm behind his head and exhaled slowly, closing his eyes. 

 

Keith stared at the planes of his face for a few more beats before looking away to the sky. The stars were still twinkling brightly. He let his eyes scan over the familiar patterns, drinking in every second of that moment; there with Lance, holding his hand and enjoying the view. It was all he’d wanted ever since that first time he met those blue… 

 

“Are you scared?” Lance asked suddenly. Keith whipped his head to the side. Lance’s eyes were still closed, but his eyebrows were bunched together. 

 

“Of what?” Keith breathed. 

 

Lance shrugged. “School, life, death. Everything.” He blinked his eyes open and turned to look at Keith. “Anything. Are you scared?”

 

“That depends,” Keith looked away, not able to stare into those eyes any longer, “on what it is. What are you scared of?”

 

Lance was quiet for a minute. “Not living up to my potential,” he finally said. “What if I can’t do it? What if I’m made for something… something I just can’t be? People expect so much from me, but don’t care about me all at once.” 

 

“I care about you,” Keith said immediately. “I know you’re going to do amazing things.”

 

Lance laughed softly. “It’s your job to tell me that.”

 

“I don’t lie, Lance,” Keith said stubbornly. “I believe that you’re going to be great.”

 

“Okay…” Lance whispered. “Then, what are  _ you  _ afraid of?”

 

“Losing something,” Keith answered. “I guess… I don’t know. I’ve lost a lot. But I also…” He looked at Lance and cleared his throat. “I gained a lot too.”

 

Lance smiled gently. “You’re not scared of high school?”

 

“Not if you’re there,” Keith said honestly. “I’m not scared of anything if you’re with me.”

 

“I…” Lance began but stopped and closed his eyes again. “That’s pretty gay, Keith.”   
  


“Is there something wrong with that?”

 

Lance blinked quickly like he was surprised at the intensity of Keith’s voice. “What?”

 

“Me being gay,” Keith said, “is there something wrong with that?”

 

“Keith, are you…”

 

“I… I don’t know,” Keith mumbled. “It doesn’t matter anyway.”

 

“No, it does,” Lance said. “And no, there’s nothing wrong with it. Like your moms. But I think… I think I might like guys a little too. But like, girls too. Is that a thing?”

 

“I think so,” Keith said slowly. “Same for me just… without the girls. So like…  _ full  _ gay.”

 

“That’s… cool.”

 

“Yeah,” Keith said quietly. “Cool.”

 

And they lay together for minutes, maybe hours, but it felt like centuries to Keith. And he liked it that way; he wanted Lance for as long as he could. He craved that warm feeling and that sweet taste in his mouth whenever he saw the boy. 

 

“Hey Lance?” he said suddenly. 

 

“What?”

 

“Do you… do you believe in soulmates?”

 

“That depends…”

 

“On?”

 

“Are aliens real?” Lance turned and faced Keith yet again, grinning so widely, Keith feared his face would split like he did so many times before. 

 

And maybe, Keith thought, broken faces weren’t something to run from. 

 

So he shattered his. 

  
  
  



	3. move so pretty; you're all i see

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Senior year

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song- Lucky by Jason Mraz and Colby Caillat
> 
> Some triggers in here but they are marked ***

“Senior year is over.”

 

“It is.” 

 

A breeze ran through the meadow, blowing petals all around. 

 

“Are you scared?” 

 

“Are aliens real?” 

 

Lance smiled and Keith’s heart stopped. His hair was shorter now, the brown wisps wrapping around his ears and just barely brushing the back of his neck. Keith wanted to reach out and twist them around his finger. 

 

Keith swallowed hard. “What are we going to do?” 

 

Lance shrugged in his usual nonchalant manner. “What  _ aren't _ we going to do Keith Kogane?” He pulled a blade of grass from the ground. “The world is our oyster.” 

 

Keith let his head fall back on the worn quilt. The stars looked so far away for the first time in his life. “I feel like an insignificant speck in the ocean compared to that oyster.” 

 

“But you're so much more.” 

 

Keith snorted. “Sure, Lance. How am I supposed to know what I'm going to be when I don't even know what I am now?” 

 

“Well that's the beauty in it, I suppose,” Lance mused, looking at the sky as well, “you don't really ever know.”

 

***

They waited in silence for a few minutes. Keith's head was racing; remembering every little thing about their years of high school. Lance’s many girlfriends and boyfriends, his laughter, his awkward alternative phase, his many swim meets that Keith attended (every single one), the one time he punched someone for calling Keith a faggot, the time he came to Keith completely stoned and crying because he didn't want his mom to find out. All of it. 

 

Keith thought about the times  _ he _ was so close to ending it all, sinking into those emotions that he tried to hard to stay away from. But he also thought about how many times Lance was there to pull him back and smile at him like that could solve everything. And it did. 

 

***

 

Keith would die for that smile. 

 

“I think,” Lance said suddenly, “that we should do something crazy.” 

 

“Crazy?” Keith said. “Define crazy.” 

 

Lance rolled over onto his side and gave Keith a crooked grin. “Something that'll make our hearts beat so fast, it'll feel like they're falling out.” 

 

Keith couldn't tell him that just being close to him did that to his heart. “Why?” 

 

“Because we can,” Lance said, a twinkle in his eye. Suddenly, he jumped up and  _ sprinted _ to the other end of the field. His blue cardigan flew in the wind and for a second Keith was back on that first visit, the blanket flapping in a similar fashion. When the present caught up to him, Keith realized he was still laying down and scrambled to his feet to run towards Lance. The other boy was spinning wide circles with his arms open wide, his laughter floating in the air. 

 

Keith watched for a moment in wonder, slowing down to a walk and then to a stop. Lance looked like art; his cuffed capris and barefeet something of a natural beauty. He held his hands above his head and danced around, skin dark and smooth in the moonlight. 

 

Keith couldn't look away; there was no way his eyes would ever forget this image. Lance was the most brilliant thing he'd ever seen. 

 

“How do you know if you're in love?” Keith blurted, making Lance stop and look at him with wide eyes. 

 

“In my experience-” 

 

“ _ Have _ you ever been in love?” Keith interrupted. 

 

Lance didn't meet his eyes. 

 

“Lance?” 

 

He looked up. “Are… are aliens real?” 

 

“How did you know?” Keith asked. “That you were in love, I mean.”

 

He scratched his neck. “It's like… I look at him and he's all I want to see for the rest of my life.”

 

“And when you look at him you don't want to stop looking or even  _ blink _ ,” said Keith. 

 

“And everything he does he makes look like art.” 

 

“And his smile makes everything okay.” 

 

Lance blinked slowly. “Exactly.” 

 

“So am I in love?” Keith asked quietly, walking slowly towards Lance. He was through with hiding. 

 

Lance pulled his lips into a line and nodded. “Yeah. At least, I hope so.” 

 

Was this actually happening? 

 

Keith finally stood directly in front of Lance and tilted his head to the side. Big blue eyes stared back at him. “Remember when you told me that I'd never get anywhere if I was too afraid to move forward?” 

 

Lance nodded again. “What are you thinking of doing?” 

 

Keith reached up and slid his hands around the back of Lance’s neck. He said, “Something I’m glad I’m not afraid of doing anymore.” And kissed him. 

 

Lance immediately wrapped his arms around his waist and kissed him with such an intensity that they almost fell over. It was a little off and kind of awkward, but it was everything Keith had ever wanted. Lance slid his hands up to cradle his face, tilting Keith’s head to the side to get the right angle. 

 

Keith reluctantly let go to pull Lance back towards the blanket, listening to his laugh as they ran through the tall grass. As soon as they reached the quilt, Keith pushed Lance until he was laying down on his back. Straddling him, Keith tugged him back in for another enthusiastic kiss, mouths moving in perfect time with each other. Lance smiled into the kiss, pushing back with just as much passion and opening his mouth. 

 

Keith let out a little sigh and deepened the kiss, pulling Lance closer and closer until there was no space left. Lance’s stomach was hot, and every once in awhile both of their shirts would ride up and their skin would touch, making bolts of energy travel down Keith’s body. He finally just reached behind Lance’s neck and pulled the cardigan and shirt off the other boy, blindly throwing it to the side. Lance groaned and kissed down Keith’s neck, making the dark haired boy arch his back and hiss out a curse. Keith could feel Lance laughing against his skin and it made him feel too much but it still wasn’t enough. 

 

Everything was hot, sweaty and fast and Keith loved every minute of it. His shirt disappeared somewhere in the middle of it all, and despite the cold bite in the air, he was warm. After what could’ve been minutes or hours, Lance finally pulled away, face red and flushed and smiling. Keith caught his breath, looking down at Lance with an arm on either side of his head. 

 

“I’m in love with you,” Lance said suddenly, frowning for a moment. “I’ve been in love with you for a really, really long time. Like, I don’t know what to do without you and I can’t lose you and… damn it!” He grabbed Keith’s head and pressed their foreheads together. 

 

“I love you more than anything in the world, Lance,” Keith said, trying not to cry. “Oh my god, it hurts how much I fucking love you.” 

 

Lance full out belly laughed and Keith couldn’t help but chuckle softly along with him, eyes closing slowly. For the first time in years, Keith was fully content with everything in his life. 

 

“What are we going to do?” Keith whispered. 

 

“I really don’t give a shit,” Lance said, “as long as I’m with you.”

 

“And you’ll stay with me?” Keith’s voice shook. 

 

“Goddamn it, Keith,” Lance said softly. “Are aliens real?”

 

Keith nodded. “God, fucking yes, they are. They are.” He pressed another soft kiss to Lance’s lips before pulling away and grinning widely at him. He didn’t open his eyes but he knew someone was smiling like a million stars right beneath his lips. 


	4. you held me and swore; you'd stay, stay, stay

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> meadows and grapes and softness

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Song- I Was an Island by Allison Weiss

“The star has returned!”

 

Keith looked up from his desk and rolled his eyes as Lance strutted into the room and propped his leg up on the couch. His boyfriend was wearing his work slacks and loose button up, but he looked stunning. Keith stood up and padded over to Lance, wrapping his arms around the other boy and pressing a soft kiss against his lips. 

 

“Star?” Keith smirked, pulling away but not letting him go. 

 

Lance gave him a crooked grin. “I got the promotion.” 

 

The announcement sunk in. “Oh my god,” Keith gasped, pulling Lance in again. Once they pulled apart he said, “That means…”

 

“I start training soon!” Lance said. “I’ll get access to all the telescopes and who knows…” He raised an eyebrow. “I might go to space.”

 

“Oh my god!” Keith yelled again, bouncing on his heels. “I can’t- wow, I just… shit, Lance.”

 

“I know right,” Lance laughed. “I was thinking we could go out to celebrate tonight? Not too many tests to grade tonight, right?” 

 

Keith ran a hand through Lance’s bangs. “I shouldn’t have too much stuff to do. And even if I did, of course I’m celebrating anyway.”

 

Lance kissed his nose. “Lovely. We leave in ten.” Then he let go and disappeared into their bedroom, whistling some catchy pop song. Keith shook his head and sighed, walking back over to the desk to shut down his laptop. He couldn’t believe that Lance, after six years in college and two working for NASA, got almost-astronaut status. Well, Lance was pretty damn good at his job, so it really wasn’t a surprise. Keith chose to ignore the fact that Lance might’ve had to leave him for months or even years at a time. 

 

Sighing, he entered their room, watching as Lance dug through his side of the dresser. His shirtless back drove Keith crazy, and it took every bit of self control that he had to not ravish the work of art. 

 

“Lost something?” Keith said. 

 

Lance jumped, eyes snapping up, looking suspiciously guilty. “Uh, nah, didn’t- uh, didn’t expect you to come in here.”

 

Keith raised an eyebrow. “I live here. This is  _ our  _ bedroom.”

 

Lance smacked the side of his head. “Silly me.” Then he looked to the side. “Uh, could I have some privacy for a moment to get changed?”

 

Keith wasted no time in replying, “My dick has literally been in your ass and you want privacy to get changed?”

 

Lance winced. “Yeah… well, just give me a second here....” He fumbled through the drawers, eyes flicking to Keith every second or so. 

 

Keith rolled his eyes. “Well, I’m going to go to the bathroom, good luck finding your sanity in there.”

 

“It’s a lost cause,” Lance said dramatically. “Enjoy your piss.”

 

“I will, thank you,” Keith called as he left the room. “What the fuck, Lance?” he muttered to himself.

 

After a refreshing trip to the bathroom and a good brushing of the hair, Keith swung back into the bedroom where Lance stood, contemplating, in a cute pair of capris and a fluffy sweater. 

 

“So this is a casual date, I presume?” Keith said, leaning against the doorframe. 

 

Lance’s face lit up when he saw him. “Yes, it might get a little chilly though, so bring something just in case.”

 

Keith walked up to him and fingered the hem of his sweater, humming. “I think I’ll wear your NASA hoodie. That shit is  _ soft _ .”

 

Lance chuckled. “I’m never getting that back, am I?”

 

Keith shook his head. “Nope.”

 

“Well,” said Lance, grabbing a packed bag off the bed and grinning, “get that hoodie and let’s blow this popsicle joint.”

 

“Lance, I don’t think…” Keith began but ended up just sighing. “Yeah, give me a second.”

 

After sliding on the hoodie and tying the laces of his red Chucks, Keith pulled his hair back in a ponytail and faced Lance. “Let’s go.”

 

Lance led him out to the car, where he swung the back into the back seat and opened the passenger door for Keith. “What a gentleman,” Keith said dryly, sliding into the seat. Lance snorted and walked around to his side of the car and shutting the door behind him. 

 

“You pick the music,” he told Keith, starting the car. As he pulled out of their driveway, Keith began thumbing through all his cassette tapes before settling on an old Counting Crows album, slipping it into the slot and turning up the volume. They both hummed along as Lance drove, down through the streets of their little city and entering the outskirts where the trees thickened and Keith’s curiosity piqued.

 

A few minutes into a drive down a familiar dirt road, Keith gasped. “Are we going to-”

 

“Yep,” Lance answered, pulling the car to a stop. “We are going to have a celebratory picnic. Perfect timing too, we get the sunset and the stars.”

 

Keith didn’t say that Lance was more remarkable than any sunset or star he’d ever seen but decided against the cheesy comment and settled for, “Okay, you dork. Good though, because I’m hungry.”

 

The sun was just brushing the horizon when they both hopped out of the car, and after Lance grabbed his pack, entered the field that they loved so much. Lance held Keith’s hand and brought them to the center of the meadow where there was flat ground not covered in the towering strands of grass. 

 

They lay the blanket down and settled on the soft cloth, hands brushing against each other as Lance laid out all the food he’d packed. There was sandwiches and juice pouches and grapes. Keith almost laughed at the childish meal, but realized that it was actually food he enjoyed and settled for a relaxed, content expression. 

 

“I made sure they were green grapes, like you like,” Lance said, voice shaky. 

 

Keith put a hand on his arm. “Babe, are you okay? You’ve seemed… off today.”

 

“The news just shook me up a bit, I guess,” Lance said. Keith could tell he was lying, but didn’t push it. If Lance wasn’t telling him something, it was probably for good reason. 

 

“Well, I must say this meal is simply  _ divine _ ,” Keith said, popping a grape into his mouth. “Thank you, love.”

 

“Okay, I’m terrible at keeping secrets,” Lance blurted. “And I don’t think there’s really a right way to do this, but I’m just going to go for it.” He stood up and made his way in front of Keith before dropping to his knee. “Keith, you’ve been my rock for god only knows how long.”

 

“Lance…”

 

“Shush, I’m making this perfect,” said Lance, so Keith just pressed his palm against his mouth to silence himself. “Ever since I met you, there’s been something about you that just makes me better, however cliched that may sound. Throughout the years, I tried to get you out of my mind, but I just couldn’t.” He took a deep breath. “You’re all I’ve ever wanted, and needed, and god, you’re so perfect. So charming in your quiet, awkward way, and so lovely and brilliant and just so goddamn beautiful.”

 

Keith thought he was going to choke when Lance fumbled around in his pocket and pulled out a small box. 

 

“Keith Kogane, the fucking love and light of my life, will you stay with me forever and-” He flicked it open, revealing a simple, elegant ring. “Marry me? It’s my grandfather’s ring and I just thought, hey I love this man more than anything in the world, why not ask him to be mine forever? And I was pretty positive that you’d say-”

 

“Are aliens real?” Keith interrupted.

 

Lance’s eyes grew wide. “Really?”

 

“Yes,” Keith breathed, lunging forward and wrapping his arms around Lance. “Stop babbling for a minute and let me say…  _ yes _ . God, of course it’s a yes. Yes, yes, yes.”

 

Lance sighed. “Thank god.” He held out his hand and Keith enthusiastically slid his into it, watching in awe as Lance slipped the band of gold around his finger. “I’ve been sitting on this for months.”

 

“And you brought me to where our first kiss happened, you fucking sap.” Keith held him tight and brought their lips together in a sweet kiss. “Helpless romantic.”

 

“What can I say?” Lance shrugged. “It’s also where I slowly fell in love with you, but whatever.”

 

Keith laughed shakily and kissed him again. “Oh my god, my moms are going to freak; they love you so much.” He rubbed his nose against Lance’s. “Not as much as me, of course.”

 

“Now who’s the sap?” Lance laughed, nuzzling into Keith’s neck. “I can’t believe we’re going to get married.”

 

“Shit,” Keith said in awe, “we’re getting married.”

 

Lance laughed again, pulling Keith impossibly close. “Yeah…” he said softly, “we’re getting married.”

 

Keith smiled widely, and with the look that Lance gave him, he never wanted to stop. 

 


	5. we're like two halves of one heart; we are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> here comes the groom 
> 
> Song- for him. by Troye Sivan aka the actual Klance theme song

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the last happy chapter my friends. sorry it took so long things have been everywhere and its been wild. sorry idk how weddings work just pretend that this is what its like
> 
> !!!if you came here for fluff, turn away now!!!
> 
> The next and last chapter is where things get *sad* so if you're not down for that, stop here at their happily ever after and just never read chapter six. however, if you love pain, read on. chapter six will be out in the next week or two since it's longer.

Keith thought that this boy was the most beautiful boy he'd ever seen. 

 

Well, not quite there yet.

 

There were moments in life, Keith thought, that you were meant to fall in love with. Just like there were places and people to fall for. But those  _ moments;  _ those three four second looks, those kisses and trapped breaths, those tired laughs… those were what mattered, what made life worth it. 

 

Keith often thought about his moments, the ones that made him fall in love with life. And every time he tried to think of a moment, it just morphed into a person. One in particular. 

 

He thought that maybe it happened for a reason, that life itself was trying to tell him something. Tell him that Lance McClain was the only person he'd ever need. Tell him that Lance McClain will keep him alive. That Lance McClain is the reason happiness itself exists. 

 

And that, Keith thought, was why he stood there, on a Sunday morning, looking in the mirror and just staring. His hair, pulled back, blowing lightly by the air being shot through the vents. His suit, perfectly ironed and pristine. His eyes, tired but so, so alive. The red rose tucked into his lapel, taunting him with love in its petals. 

 

Keith thought a lot of things. Especially right then. 

 

“Keith!” He heard a shout from outside the bathroom. Shiro. 

 

“I'll be out in a moment,” he called back. 

 

“You better be.” His brother sounded impatient for the first time in his life. “I know you Keith, and I swear if you're-” 

 

“I'll be out, Shiro,” he said, exasperated. “Just give me a minute.” He pressed his hands against the counter and leaned forward, rocking back and forth on his heels. 

 

Today is a big day, Keith thought, big, big, big day. Biggest day in his life, actually. Wow, big. 

 

He should probably stop procrastinating. 

 

With one push, Keith opened the door and walked into the hall, breathing quickly. His brother waited at the end of the hall, dressed in a finely tailored suit, a shawl draped over his arm, most likely for his wife. Keith waved at him. 

 

“I’m ready,” he said. 

 

Shiro gave him a look. “No you’re not.”

 

“I’m not,” Keith agreed, wiping a hand down his face. “What if he doesn’t want to marry me?”

 

“Keith, he proposed to you,” Shiro said. “That usually means that someone wants to marry you.”

 

“But-”

 

“Keith.” Shiro placed firm hands on his shoulders. “That boy out there is crazy for you. He has been since you were kids. He’s not going to bail on you, and he most definitely wants to marry you. Okay?”

 

“Okay,” he said reluctantly. Shiro let go of him, giving him one last pat. 

 

“You’ve got this,” he told Keith. 

 

“Yeah, yeah.” Keith shrugged his brother off and stalked down the hall, messing with strands of his hair. His stomach felt heavy, his mind static, limbs buzzing. This was  _ the  _ day. 

 

~

 

“Ready, nerd?” Pidge asked, amber eyes glinting behind wire framed glasses. 

 

Keith fixed his tie. “Say you, Pidge. Nerd? You literally nicknamed your girlfriend Rover after you reprogrammed her wheelchair. Sounds pretty nerdy to me.”

 

Pidge snapped their fingers. “You got me there. But you gotta admit: those revamps were sick. I’m a romantic.”

 

Rover rolled up, wearing a nice blue and grey dress. Her short dark hair was curled nicely and she wore a green flower that matched Pidge’s vest. “Hey, guys.”

 

“Speak of the devil,” Keith murmured while Pidge went and kissed her on the cheek. “Rover, you look great.” 

 

Pidge sat down on the arm of the wheelchair and wrapped their arm around their girlfriend. “She does, doesn't she?” 

 

Rover blushed and looked down. “Nah. You should see Lance.” 

 

“Shit,” Keith cursed, “I can't do this.” 

 

“Keith’s having a mental breakdown,” Pidge told Rover. “Look, from all the stories you've told me, this guy loves you so much.”

 

Pidge was an old foster friend; Keith stayed at the Holt’s for a good chunk of time when he was younger and managed to get back in touch with Pidge. They'd never met Lance, but today that's changing. Another reason for Keith to be freaking out. 

 

“Yeah, but I feel like I'm going to vomit,” Keith said, rubbing his head. “What if he doesn't show up? What if I say something wrong? Shit, shit, shit.” 

 

“Calm down, Keith,” Rover said, placing her hand on his arm. “Lance is just as nervous but he'll be there. Don't leave him hanging.” 

 

“I want to marry him, I really do, I just…” Keith groaned loudly. “God this is insane. We're insane.” 

 

“Gay and insane,” Pidge confirmed, nodding. “But also gay and in love so go out there, dude. Get that shit done.” 

 

“Thanks, Pidge,” he said dryly. “God, what time is it?” 

 

Pidge checked their watch. “9:46. 14 minutes to go.” 

 

Keith’s heart started beating faster. “I can do this. I can do this.” He looked frantically at Pidge. “I can't do this.” 

 

“Oh my god,” Pidge drawled. “I will literally drag you onto the stage if I need to. Don't be  _ that  _ guy.” 

 

Keith tapped his fingers on his thigh. “I think I'm going to get sick.” 

 

Rover winced. “Please don't. Just breathe.” 

 

“I can't.” 

 

Pidge rolled their eyes. “Well obviously you can if  _ you're still bickering _ .”

 

Keith knew Pidge was just trying to help, in their own strange and slightly degrading fashion. But right now, he just needed a hug. And Lance. He always needed Lance. 

 

He took a deep breath. No more procrastinating. No more worrying. No regrets, right? 

 

“Let's go,” he said. 

 

Big day.

-

 

The beach was lovely; only slightly breezy, with sand still damp from rain the night before. Keith had only been to Varadero a few times before, all visiting Lance’s family, but he'd never visited this part of the beach. It was serene; small. Perfect for a wedding. 

 

Expect for all of Lance’s family running around, yelling and laughing. Keith stood awkwardly behind a little curtain that waved in the wind, waiting for his cue to start walking. Shiro stood next to him, checking his watch. 

 

“You almost ready?” he asked Keith, raising a perfectly trimmed brow. How was his brother so handsome and pretty at the same time? 

 

“No,” Keith said truthfully, “but I'm going to do it anyway.”

 

“Allura said to start walking at exactly 10,” Shiro said. “One minute.” 

 

“Your wife has a problem,” Keith said, chuckling nervously. 

 

“She's  _ punctual, _ ” Shiro said defensively. 

 

Keith snorted. “Yeah, still don't know how you two ended up together.” 

 

“You're a shy college professor almost married to the human equivalent of a puppy,” Shiro pointed out. “How did  _ that  _ happen?” 

 

“I-” Keith started, but Shiro cut him off. 

 

“Time,” he said, looping his arm though Keith’s and squeezing for a minute. 

 

Keith took a deep breath through his nose and released it through pursed lips. “Okay.” 

 

Shiro gave him a smile before pushing the cloth to the side and leading him down a sandy aisle. The pews on either side of him were filled, and Keith could recognize a few of his and Lance’s college friends, Lance’s childhood friend Hunk and a whole bunch of his family. Keith’s moms sat near the front, chatting with Lance’s father before whipping around to see him walk down. They looked so  _ happy _ , Keith thought he might burst. 

 

Shiro’s grip tightened on his arm in reassurance as they continued further down. All eyes were on them; every last happy/sad/adoring/jealous stare. When they reached the end of the aisle, Shiro let go of Keith and stepped to one side of the little stage while Keith went to the other. Keith’s hands were shaking as he clasped them together and watched his brother walk across the wooden planks with confidence he would kill to have. 

 

After taking a deep breath, Keith blinked slowly and waited for a certain blue eyed man to come walking towards him. A few seconds later, a soothing music began playing again and Lance, arm linked through his mother’s, began to strut down the walkway with a relaxed smile. When his eyes met Keith’s, their stares locked and Keith felt like he was falling in love all over again. 

 

Lance finally broke his gaze away and made it to the little platform, standing close but not too close to Keith, facing the officiant. Keith didn’t really pay attention to what the older man was saying; he was too busy staring at Lance. 

 

He never thought he would be here. Never. Especially as a child, with no one. Then to his family, and his confusion about who he loved, to Lance and their meadow. Nothing felt real. And Keith loved it. 

 

“Keith?” 

 

Keith shook out of his stupor and stared at the officiant with wide eyes. 

 

“Your vows?”

 

“Oh!” Keith straightened and turned to Lance. “Lance, I think I’ve loved you from the moment I met you; on that porch. Wow, that sounds stupid, and really cheesy, but it’s so true that it hurts. I don’t know what I would do without you in my life. I want this to be short and to the point, so here goes nothing: I love you. You’re everything to me and I would give up anything to just be by your side for the rest of my life. I’m the best me with you and I never want to let you go.” He slid the silver and blue ring over Lance’s slender finger.

 

“Lance?” 

 

“Keith, I love space.” Lance paused, closing his eyes briefly. “I love the vastness of it; the idea that there are worlds out there that we might never know about, but we’re always trying to reach them. To me, Keith, you’re space. You’re something I love, something I’ll always keep trying to learn more about, and something that will always surprise me and make me love it more. You’re my moon, my sun and my stars, Keith. You are a celestial body that I will always admire, and yet my entire universe all in one.”

 

Keith couldn’t breathe as Lance took his hand gently and pushed the ring onto his finger. 

 

He didn’t think he could wait until the officiant declared them husband and husband, but he did and once the words, “you may now kiss the groom” left his lips, he shot forward and wrapped his arms around Lance, and kissed him with so much intent, he almost knocked them over. Cheers erupted from the crowd and Keith grinned. Big day. Big grin. 

 

***

He didn’t notice when Lance left for a couple of minutes to go vomit in the bushes before coming back and pretending that everything was fine. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'ALL
> 
> so self promo here- my tumblr is goodbye-seeyouthen and i produce hardly any original content but i really like talking to people and human interaction so like also my twitter is lit??? @taylorc1206


	6. but when the lights out; it's me and you now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> don't be scared anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *** this whole chapter is about cancer and has blood and vomiting***
> 
> Y'all there's one more after this and it's not very long. This is it. 
> 
> Chapter title; WILD by Troye Sivan

 

“Headache?”

 

Lance looked up at Keith with tired eyes and nodded. Keith frowned and sat down on the couch next to him, dropping two Advils in his husband’s hand and giving him a glass of room temperature water. He watched as Lance downed the two pills.

 

“How long?” Keith asked, pressing the back of his hand against Lance’s forehead and wincing a bit.

 

“Four hours,” Lance croaked, squeezing his eyes shut.

 

“Do you want me to take you to the hospital?”

 

Lance shook his head. “I’ll be fine. I just need rest. Tomorrow is going to be big.”

 

Keith pressed his lips together. “Lance, I don’t think-”

 

“I’m fine, Keith.” Lance rubbed his temples and leaned back against the cushions of their new couch, arching his back a little. “I have to be ready for tomorrow.”

 

“I know, I know,” Keith said, smoothing back his husband’s hair. He was getting so frail these days, looking paler than usual and losing weight. “You’d… you’d tell me if something was wrong, right?”

 

“Of course,” Lance said, but his voice cracked near the end. He coughed. “It’s probably nothing. Tomorrow they’ll say that I’m fine and I just have a cold or something.”

 

“It’s the health inspection right?” Keith asked, throwing an arm over Lance’s torso and cuddling into his husband’s side. “To make sure you’re good to go?”

 

Lance nodded. “I keep having to remind myself I’ll only be away from you for six months, but that sounds like too much time.” He nuzzled into Keith’s hair, sighing.

 

“I don’t want you to leave either,” Keith mumbled. “But I know this has been your dream. And I love you and want you to be happy. Just… say hi to the stars for me, huh?”

 

Lance pressed close to the other man’s neck, breathing softly. “Of course.”

 

-

 

Keith paced in the hospital hallway, pressing a hand to his abdomen. After being thrown out of the room by the head doctor, for reasons unknown, he hadn’t stopped moving. He hated hospitals; hated how they smelled, hated how the nurses always ignored everyone, how the hand soap smelled like dead people. Hated it all.

 

Keith especially hated how they wouldn’t let him see his husband for _three hours._ Three hours! He smacked the wall with his hand, leaning on his forearm against the cool wall and clenching his fist. Echoes of footsteps across the hall pounded into his head, just making the ache worse. What was wrong with Lance?

 

After another hour, someone finally left the room: Rolo from Lance’s work; this shady guy that Keith never liked. Keith lurched forward and grabbed the man’s shoulder before he could walk away.

 

“What’s wrong?” Keith asked desperately.

 

For once, Rolo looked serious. “You’re allowed in now, I think.” His eyes flicked away from Keith’s gaze. “I don’t…” Then he just walked away, shaking his head.

 

Keith froze for a moment, hand moving to the handle but only hovering there for a moment. Finally, he swallowed and opened the door fully and took in the scene before him.

 

Lance was sitting on the edge of the bed, a pale blue hospital gown hanging off one shoulder. Two nurses stood off to the side, reading something off a clipboard while a doctor talked to Lance, gesturing to scans of something. Lance was nodding, lips pressed tightly together.

 

“Lance?” Keith’s voice broke. “Love, what’s wrong?”

 

Lance turned to Keith and smiled sadly, tilting his head to the side. Tears began to slip down his face and Keith shattered, practically jumping forward to wipe them off his face, kissing each of Lance’s cheeks.

 

“I’m sorry,” Lance whispered. “I should’ve- I thought- I’m so sorry.”

 

“Lance, Lance, Lance,” Keith said, caressing his husband’s face with his thumbs, rubbing in soft, soothing motions. “Calm down, love.”

 

Lance shook his head. “Keith… I…” He pressed Keith close to him and held him there, still shaking. “It’s spread too much.”

 

Keith froze, eyes opening wide. “Lance…”

 

“I knew something was wrong,” Lance admitted, pulling away, “I just didn’t think… not this.”

 

“Lance, please don’t tell me-”

 

“Sir, your husband has a primitive neuroectodermal tumor in his cerebellum,” the doctor said. “It’s not a common form of brain cancer, but it’s not super rare. The problem is…”

 

Keith couldn’t stop the tears once they started to run. “What? What’s the problem.”

 

The doctor winced. “It’s spread quite a bit and it’s looking like a second tumor is forming. And since it’s in the cerebellum, that means-”

 

“I know what the fuck it means, _doctor_ ,” Keith snapped, “I teach anatomy and physiology at the university down the road, don’t talk to me like I’m five.”

 

“Keith…” Lance said softly, lightly putting pressure on the dark haired man’s arm. “He was just making sure you knew.”

 

Keith’s head dropped and he rubbed his jaw, trying to work up the resolve to look up; to face it. “I know,” he said in a low voice, “it’s just- it’s…”

 

“I’ll be fine,” Lance said, placing a gentle hand beneath Keith’s chin and lifting his head up to gaze softly into his eyes. “Everything will be fine.”

 

And god damn him, Keith believed it.

 

-

 

Keith pressed the phone closer to his ear using his shoulder, his left hand typing something on the computer; the right flipping over burger patties on the mini grill. “Sorry Mr. A, I promise the final will be ready by Monday. There’s been some… familial issues, and-”

 

“I heard, Mr. McClain, about your husband,” the director of the university’s board said calmly. “Take your time. The advanced anatomy professor is working to format his final for your students. Take care of your family.”

 

Keith paused, setting down the spatula and bracing himself on the counter. “Who, uh, who told you?”

 

“One of our former students works where your husband does- did- and reached out to me because she was concerned. It is not of import, Mr. McClain and as I said, all will be well. Enjoy your dinner.” And the director hung up.

 

Keith let out a shaky breath and turned the grill off. After shutting his laptop, he gathered two plates, sliding one patty onto each before grabbing the bag of buns and whisking himself into the main bedroom of his and Lance’s house.

 

Lance was sitting up in the bed, head buried in a book before Keith tapped him on the shoulder and slid both of the plates onto the bed. “What do you want on it?” Keith asked.

 

Lance closed the book- _A Court of Mist and Fury_ \- and gave him a small smile. “Mustard is fine. Thank you.” He leaned forward and pressed a small kiss on his husband’s lips. Keith hopped out of the bed and into the kitchen, whirling around grabbing  bottles and cups before entering the room again.

 

Once they were all set, Keith said, “How are you feeling today?”

 

Lance chewed on a small bite before saying, “Not bad. Just…” He looked down at the plate. “Not that hungry, I guess.” Then he pressed his hand against his mouth and lunged out of bed and into their bathroom. Keith squeezed his eyes shut and tried not to think as he listened to Lance emptying whatever was in his stomach into the toilet.

 

“I’m sorry,” Lance croaked once he came back into the room, “the food was delicious.”

 

Keith dragged a hand down his face. “I’ll ask your doctor what foods I can make that won’t upset you. I’m sorry.”

 

“It’s not your fault,” Lance said, lacing their fingers together. “I love you.”

 

“I love you too,” Keith mumbled back. He messed around with his food. “The director called today.”

 

“So that’s who you were talking to.”

 

Keith nodded. “He said not to worry about the final. I guess someone told him.”

 

Lance cursed. “I don’t want to be a cancer pity story for everyone, Keith! This is your _job_.”

 

“I didn’t tell anyone, I swear. And besides, why are we hiding this? It’s not like-”

 

“We still have to live our lives, Keith, and if we get through this-”

 

Keith sat up, almost dumping his long forgotten burger over. “Once we get through this, Lance, _once_ we get through this. Not _if_.”

 

Lance eyed him warily. “You heard what doc said-”

 

“I don’t give a fucking _shit_ what the doctor said! We’re making it through this, you’re going to get better and then go to space and we’re going to be fine.” Keith started crying, pressing fists to his eyes, turning away so Lance didn’t have to see him. “ _We’re going to be fine._ ”

 

“Of course, sweetheart… of course.”

 

-

 

Keith felt something drip on his shoulder, warm and wet. Blinking his eyes open, he felt around the bed only to look straight up into dull blue eyes. Lance leaned over him, one arm braced on the ride side of his head, the other covering the brunet’s nose. Lance’s eyes were wild with fear, even in the dark.

 

“Lance,” Keith said, scrambling up, pushing his husband back a little in the process. “What’s wrong?”

 

Lance pulled his hand away and stared at it, unblinking. Blood oozed off his fingers and onto their sheets, spreading like ink in water. “I don’t… know.”

 

Keith wiped his shoulder, red staining his fingertips when he brought them to his face. Wide eyed, he looked back to Lance, whose nose hadn’t stopped bleeding, streaks of blood dripping like a faucet. Keith was frozen; his limbs didn’t let him move and he watched as red tears fell from Lance’s nose, then mouth, then eyes. Keith tried to scream but he could only watch helplessly as his husband dropped to the floor, still.

 

-

 

Keith woke up with a gasp, scrambling to find a grip on the plastic hospital chair. He was panting as he took in his surroundings. Static television. A constant, faint beeping. The turn of a magazine page.

 

Keith met Lance’s mother’s eyes from across the room after she’d looked up from her magazine.

 

“He’s okay,” Celeste said, closing it. “They’ve taken him in for some more testing, so I thought I’d let you get some rest.” She tilted her head to the side, giving Keith a loving gaze. “Did you have a bad dream?”

 

Keith gulped. “It was nothing. How- how did he look when they took him?”

 

“That boy could be in hell and still have a smile on his face,” she said softly.

 

Keith leaned forward and braced himself on his knees. “He was upset that Leo couldn’t make it,” Keith said referring to Lance’s older brother. He thought back to the first day he’d known Lance, how his older sister had opened the door; that older sister now Leo McClain, much happier and a successful entrepreneur.

 

“Nelly and the boys will be here tomorrow,” Celeste said. “I called them an hour or so ago; told them…” She trailed off and looked out the window.

 

Keith knew the words she was about to say.

 

 _It’s probably time to start saying goodbye,_ the doctor had said to them the day before.

 

“That’s… good,” said Keith. He cleared his throat. “Do you… um, do you know what he said to me last night?” Keith’s voice wobbled as Celeste slowly shook her head. “He told me how he wanted to die. I sat and listened to the love of my life vivaciously describe to me how he wanted his last days to go.” He was crying now. “Why is he the only one that isn’t afraid? Mama, _what am I going to do without him_?”

 

Celeste hummed worriedly and bustled over to Keith, wrapping her arms around him, standing him up so she could hug him. He curled into her arms, thin frame shaking as she squeezed him harder. He forgot how nice one of these embraces felt; ever since his mothers’ passing he hadn’t had many.

 

“ _Mijo_ ,” Celeste murmured in his ear, “ _mijo_ , _mijo_.”

 

“I don’t know,” Keith repeated. “I don’t know what I’ll do.”

 

“Don’t think like that,” she said, pulling away and pushing back a few of his stray hairs. “You keep optimistic, okay? You keep optimistic and no matter how bad it gets, you will always have light. You have so much light Keith, so much.”

 

“I’ve lost so much,” Keith said softly. “My biological parents. My moms. If I lose him… I won’t have anything left.”

 

“You have your brother. And you have us. You will always have us; you are _family_ , Keith.” Celeste ran her hands down his arms soothingly. “Even when Lance is gone.”

 

Keith didn’t want to imagine her without her son. He didn’t want to imagine Nelly or Leo or Sophie without a brother. But most of all, he selfishly didn’t want to imagine himself without Lance.

 

-

 

It was a Monday. One of the hottest days of the year, but at night. Keith drove down the highway with a solemn expression, one hand on the wheel and the other laced with Lance’s. The brunet was practically bouncing in his seat, squeezing Keith’s hand tightly.

 

“I don’t know why you’re so excited,” said Keith, flicking his turn signal on a preparing to turn off the interstate. “You know where we’re going.”

 

Lance sighed happily, huddling into the blanket around his shoulders. “I heard that unspoken statement, don’t you think I didn’t. But it’s my favorite place, obviously. So sorry, Mr. Grumps for being happy.”

 

Keith snorted. “Whatever, Mr. Melodrama. Did you bring the Gatorades?”

 

Lance nodded. “Yep; they’re in the back.”

 

“Good,” Keith said. The road beneath them turned to gravel as they got closer to the meadow. Rays of sun bled through the sky, sinking and spreading along the horizon as the car parked on the side of the road, Keith unbuckling and turning off the ignition.

 

Lance stretched backward and groaned. “I forgot what it felt like here.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Happy,” Lance said, smiling. “I’m just happy.”

 

Keith swallowed hard. “Please don’t say things like that.”

 

“Am I not allowed to be happy?” Lance grinned with yellow teeth. Keith cringed at the sight, opening the car door. He didn’t want to think about Lance’s health, although he knew he had to. And soon too.

 

“Of course I want you to be happy, just…” Keith paused, hand resting on the open door. “Never mind. Let’s go.”

 

-

 

Keith traced letters on the back of Lance’s hand, curling in closer to his side as the sun finally set. A warm breeze blew strands of his hair all around his head and he laughed, turning to Lance saying, “It’s like it knows.”

 

“This meadow knows all of our secrets,” Lance said, grinning. A shriveled petal floated into his lap and he picked it up, turning it over in his fingers. “It knows.”

 

Keith took the dead flower from him and held it up in the moonlight. “It’s sad too, I think.” He dropped it. “I’m sad.” The truth hit him like a blow to the stomach. He hadn’t let himself think that way, not until now. “Lance, I’m so sad.”

 

Lance placed his soft hand on Keith’s cheek and smiled. “Don’t be. I’ll be fine.” He picked up a healthy flower, purple and vibrant. “I think I want to be reborn as one of these. So I’ll always be here when you come.”

 

Keith buried his head into his husband’s shoulder. “You’ll always be with me.”

 

“I will.”

 

Keith paused, then looked him in the eye. “Are you scared?” he asked, the question that Lance had asked so long ago.

 

“I was scared,” Lance admitted, tucking a hand behind his head. “You know, of not living up to my potential and such. Especially as I knew I had limited time. But I think I did just fine. I have you, and my family and I couldn’t have asked for a better life.” He looked at Keith. “Are _you_ scared?”

 

“I was scared of losing something,” Keith replied softly. “I didn’t think that it would be so soon. But good things don’t last forever, that’s what makes them good. I had lost so much, Lance, so much and you gave it all back. I’m scared Lance, but I’m also so grateful.”

 

Lance held him close as he began to sob, murmuring in his ear, “I will always love you Keith, I will always love you. I always have and I’ll never stop. You’re my everything, my _everything_.” Smoothing down Keith’s hair, he added, “Are you ready?”

 

“Are aliens real?” Came Keith’s mumbled reply.

 

Lance laughed and held him closer and this…

 

Keith had thought. Thought a lot about many things.

 

And Keith thought that this boy must be the most beautiful boy in the world.

 

No. For once in his life, Keith _knew_ something.

 

He _knew_ that Lance was the most beautiful thing in the world.

 

And then he wasn’t scared anymore.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	7. living

Keith walked up to the meadow and sighed, taking in the peacefulness of it; the families having picnics and kids running around.  _ Lance would’ve loved this _ , he thought. He continued walking, waving at a few of the regulars, throwing a couple of smiles their way. 

 

Three years. Three years since Keith had opened this place as the Lance McClain Memorial Park, or the Star Field as many called it. He stopped in the center, staring at the horizon and the sinking sun just above it. Stars beginning to appear in the sky. 

 

“Mr. McClain, Mr. McClain!” Three kids called, giggling as they ran toward him. 

 

“Hey kiddos,” he greeted them. “What’s up?”

 

“We have something for you,” said a little boy with blue eyes and toffee skin. He held out a freckled hand and presented Keith with a lovely purple flower. “Here you go.”

 

Keith took it, staring at the petals in the palm of his hand. As if the meadow knew, a breeze blew through his hair and he smiled at the children. “Thank you.” They laughed and ran away, shoving each other playfully and shouting. 

 

Keith turned around and walked towards the tree off near the edge of the field. A single stone stood beneath it, the words Keith had memorized inscribed into the soft rock. Biting his lip, he placed the flower on top of it. 

 

“ _ Finalmente aprendí a qué hacer sin ti. Que estoy viviendo _ .”

 

{“I finally learned what to do without you. I am living.”}

 

And a flutter of the flowers petals was enough to make Keith smile wide enough to break the sky.

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> My personal tumblr is goodbye-seeyouthen if you wanna see the klance trashbin or just talk to me because I love talking to people


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